Thursday, September 17, 2009

Jenny Lawson Wants To Sleep With My Husband Or She Wants Me To Perform A Prison Style Shanking For Her, Either Way I'm Fine

The other day I noticed that my husband had tweeted something about how he didn't understand why everyone would hate The Bloggess. I was a little perplexed and told him that was ridiculous, who would hate her? But then she responded:



Moments later I get this in my inbox:



So I DM'd the mister and told him she was following me all of the sudden and he said "I told her that you like to shank people." Totally true and fair enough. But I was onto her (click to read):



And then she was quiet.

Until today:




If my husband comes home smelling like Crazy and Wolverines, I'm going to be very upset. However, if this is just a ploy to get to me and my shanking abilities, well... All you had to do was ask because I won't hesitate to cut a bitch.

Okay, that's a lie. I totally hesitate, every time, but that is just so I make sure I hit a major organ.

If you're going to do it, do it right.

All of this really happened, except for the part where she wants to sleep with my husband, I made that part up. However, I know the rest of you do. I'm onto you.

6 comments:

jerrod said...

this cracked me up.. and somehow you make a shanking from you seem like a good time. that's scary.

Rassles said...

I only want to sleep with him because you said so, and whatever you say is what I want to do.

Miss Yvonne said...

I'm so confused about where I should be commenting! Also, how do you spell commenting??

P.S. tiny tacos.

Anonymous said...

Damn. It's like I should be carrying around a shank from now on. You're the third person this week to mention it.......

Going to make one right now. What do I need? Razors, a toothbrush...?

Rassles said...

WHERE ARE YOU?

GAAAAHHHHH

Sam said...

Miss you? ????