Wednesday, January 20, 2010

T-Minus Two Days...

Two days, that is what I have left in my current office. Monday we make the move to Hans and Dieter and I have to tell you, I'm not sufficiently medicated.

Tomorrow I get half of the Blackberry/Laptop combo that is known as the "corporate umbilical cord". The other half comes next week, with orientations and training sessions and corporatey horseshit.

I mean horseshit with the utmost of respect, because frankly, I used to be fully on board the corporatey horseshit train. Choo Choo mother fucker.

Did I mention that on a normal day there are five of us in my office that do my particular job and today there was just me. Me, with my office in boxes and a nonfunctioning printer and copier. All the tools of success.

So when my co-worker who hadn't answered a call since noon yesterday, who didn't call in before noon today told me that something "wasn't as high a priority as you think it is." after he sat on this huge "to do" list for a week that I was given LAST NIGHT, I dutifully informed him that I did indeed "have the priority straight, especially since we're down for two days moving our office (jackass)." He conceded.

What I'm saying here is that, while I came back to blogging, I need leniency. Delicious,sweet leniency because I'm undermedicated, overworked and trying to determine the fine line between stomach irritation and ulcer. Have no worry, because tomorrow I will have that Blackberry and I will have webMD at my fingertips, even in the CAR, to determine if "hole in stomach lining" is worth adding to my resume.

And have I mentioned that my hair is mostly detestable? Well it is, but I greatly believe my perspective on that will change after my doctor's appointment next week, because one way I always know that the doldrums have settled in is when I feel the need to shave my head and just start over.

Which now that I have laid all of this out, I suppose that I should look at this whole office moving experience as shaving the head of my career and starting over. Only there will be no party in the back of my new mullet. Just business all over.

Business all over.

Choo choo mother fucker

Ps... I promised a BoomTube Saturday night and I might have to move it to Friday. Jason and I have decided to get a hotel room at the casino and get away from the kids for a night before they end up on the side of a milk carton.

Please don't call child protective services.


Ginny said...

Hobos are nice and all, but the modernistic freakiness that is sure to go down at Hans & Dieter's place is sure to be good fun, too.

Have fun at the casino. Can you put $20 on black for me? And if I win, just let it ride.

Miss Yvonne said...

I'm starting to think that I am also seriously undermedicated. As in, why the fuck am I not on anything???

I'm totally jealous of your casino getaway. I want to call you a whore for it, but I just love you too much to do that. Bitch.

Anonymous said...

Casino getaway. WTF? ;)

Choo choo mother fucker is going to become my new favorite saying. Quite appropriate for many facets of life :)

オテモヤン said...


Faye Acklin said...

Choo choo what?? Hahaha! But seriously, that sounds funny. Moving in to a new office really needs some adjustments in almost everything. Good thing you were able to pull it off. How's your new office now, then?